1992 – saleintothe90s

434. What Sports Illustrated got wrong with their Olympic gymnastics predictions (1984-1996)

When I was in elementary school, my mom would buy me bundles of old Sports Illustrated magazines from the thrift store on the air force base. I’d always pour through the issues, looking at the old ads, and keeping my eye out on figure skating articles.

Then, this one time in 5th grade, my mom bought me home this massive, nearly phonebook sized edition of SI. The 1984 Olympic preview. That was when I was first introduced to the “Who will win what” section fo every preview issue. The expert opinions on who will win what medals at the Olympics. I love looking back on them, even way back then to see what they got wrong.

I know some are wondering where the Sports Illustrated issue for 1980 is. In the United States, we seriously don’t know much about that Olympics since the U.S. boycotted the Summer Olympics, with them being in the Soviet Union and whatnots. I don’t even think it was on TV here. In fact, there wasn’t even a preview issue.

1984:

S.I. got the team prediction 100%.

While we, in America associate Mary Lou Retton with the star of the 1984 games due to her winning the all around, I feel like really, it was Ecaterina Szabo, she won gold medals on the balance beam, floor, and vault.

Both Julianne McNamara and Ma Yanhong tied for gold at the uneven bars. I was surprised to see Pam Bileck predicted to win a bronze on the balance beam. She didn’t even make the event finals.

For the rhythmic gymnastics, Lori Fung of Canada won the first gold medal of the sport.

The men’s results were all over the place. The United States surprisingly won gold in the team competition. Vault, floor exercise, and rings were the only correct gold medal predictions.

S.I. was asleep on Koji Gushiken, who won the all around, rings, and a silver medal on vault.

1988:

The Soviets were back in 1998, and the United States didn’t fare well at all. The only medalist was a bronze medal for Phoebe Mills on the balance beam. Hey, S.I. got that prediction right.

There is absolutely no mention of Svetlana Boginskaya from the Soviet Union, who walked away from the games with gold medals in the team and vault, silver medal on the floor, and a bronze in the all around.

Like with Svetlana, no mention of her teammate on the men’s team, Vladimir Artemov who won gold medals in the team, all around, and horizontal bar, and a silver on the floor exercise.

1992:

S.I. absolutely slept on Shannon Miller in 1992. They, like everyone else was focused on Kim Zmeskal who fell on the first night of competition, in her first event. Shannon went on to win a silver in the all around, a bronze in team competition, and three medals in individual events.

I guess due to her breakthrough in 1998, S.I. believed that Svetlana Boginskaya could win all around that year. She placed a respectable fifth, but did not win any individual medals that year.

For the men, VItaly Sherbo won five gold medals in Barcelona. The magazine got his all around prediction correct.

Oh! I almost forgot about Trent Dimas blew everybody away and won the gold on the horizontal bar.

1996:

Wow, it was as though S.I. had no hope for the United States ladies, predicting a bronze medal in the team event. Of course, we all know who won that.

I was surprised that they thought that Svetlana Khorkina would win the all around. I thought she was just a master of bars at this point in her career. She placed 15th in the all around.

While they were correct about Khorkina’s uneven bars win, they didn’t even think that silver medalist Amy Chow was in the running.

Or, Dominique Dawes winning bronze in the floor exercise. Or, Shannon Miller winning gold on the balance beam.

For the men, Ukraine won the bronze medal. On the subject of bronze medals, Vitaly Sherbo won four of them this time around after a tumultuous time after the 1992 Olympics (left Belarus for the United States, then his wife was in a car accident).

Jair Lynch of the United States won a silver medal on the parallel bars. ‘Yall know he has his own real estate development firm?

327. The “Wacky Tape” from around 1992, part 2

(part 1 of the tape entries)

(part 6)

“Did he call me a wanker?!”

Aw, back when Dennis Miller was relevant and still had his big hair that made him look so hot.

“But they were just kids! Young, talented! You butchers!!”

When I originally watched this tape back in 2002, it drove me nuts trying to figure out who this guy was. I feel like he was on tv a lot in the early 90s? Did I make that up?!

(part 7)

Part seven starts off right at the bat with these terrifying puppets from some sort of Christian show discussing about how their dad is working on his temper.

and then! from the same show, this awkward cowboy fight happens:

I have to break down this next scene piece by piece, Dinosaur Dracula style. It’s from the 1980 John Ritter movie Hero at Large. John foils a convenience store robbery in this scene.

The Dolly Madison display!

The Doritos and Lays! Beef Franks!

John Ritter breathing awkwardly!

and then the Magic Copier commercial appears! That, that was a toy that was only played with on Christmas night because you ran low on the carbon paper.

Our cowboy is back. We are only 5:41 into this, people!

That was my radio station when I was 9!

(part 8)

“This is why I’m so proud to be in radio … I get to compete with guys in sailor caps.”

One of my top five favorite books is Howard Stern’s Miss America, because he rags on the previous lame morning zoo personalities he’s had beefs with, including sailor cap wearing DeBella.

I remember watching this show with my dad a few times when I was in elementary school, during all the Hard Copy knockoffs.

(part 9)

Part 9 is a little different. Due to the YouTube Police, I had to do a YouTube sin–I had to record off my screen using my phone. I decided to spice it up a little and use one of those apps that makes your videos look like an old camcorder recording.

Is MTV’s Tabatha Soren interviewing my boyfriend Joe Biden? I can’t tell. She was at one of the earliest 1992 election primaries.

(part 10, highlights from Snapchat)

If you thought part 9 was bad, here’s part 10, that is just some highlights from my Snapchat (thelastvcr). This was all the Lurleen episode of Simpsons, so obviously that couldn’t go on YouTube.

The main draw from these highlights has to be the Nike Instant Karma Commercial. I remember seeing that commercial during Simpsons when I was 8. Heck, it may of been this episode, that exact night this tape was recorded.

Also, the old logo for the Fox station growing up. I think its channel 43 now in the Hampton Roads area?

(part 11) – yes that gif says part 10 i have a headache.

Marge has always freaked me out right here! Her neck looks exxtra loong because she doesn’t have her orange pearls on.

The rest is a Charles Grodin interview on Letterman, which I guess I should’ve edited out. But … but Beethoven comes to visit his movie dad.

(part 12)

There’s some great footage in here of “Faces of Culture”, also, two white horses fighting:

320. Shannon Miller Comes Home (August, 1992)

When I was 9 years old, I remember seeing the news reports and articles about the ~big deal~ it was when gymnast Shannon Miller came home to Oklahoma from the 1992 Olympics after winning five medals. Of course, I was obsessed with Shannon, of course I named my Skipper doll with crimped hair Shannon Miller.

What I remember the most is reading an article where a local Saturn dealership gave her a car– ok, so the news made it look like she got a car, but she didn’t-at first. Her mom explains:

Shannon also visited Washington D.C. Things got a little creepy (and sad?) in D.C.:

“Fawn young lady,” said the tall man who was shaking her hand, a man she may or may not have realized was Sen. Strom Thurmond of South Carolina.

Sen. Don Nickles, from her home state of Oklahoma, leaned down and, speaking to her in the tones one uses on a 5-year-old rather than a 15-year-old who gets straight A’s in school, said, “We’re going to give you a little presentation, is that all right?”

“Fawn young lady”?! What does that even mean?! Was Strom calling her a baby deer?!

At the Capitol, Miller eventually drifted to a corner of the room, to a TV set. It had been playing a videotape of her final vaults, over and over, and no one in this little Senate chamber crowd had been paying much attention, because most everyone had seen it on TV when it happened. But the gymnast herself had never seen it.

She was rapt.

She said nothing.

A crowd gathered to watch her watch. [Coach Steve] Nunno provided the dramatic narrative: “Remember, they had a stall. We had to wait an eternity. The Spaniards kept trying to throw us off."The real Shannon still said nothing. The TV Shannon finally took off down the runway, arms hacking the air, eyes glowering, then bounded off the springboard and the vault, 69 pounds at escape velocity, flipping and twisting, and finally augered perfectly into the mat.

Both crowds, real and televised, broke into cheers, and the gymnast permitted herself a smile. "Good work!” said Sen. Bob Dole.But the judges in Barcelona didn’t give Shannon Miller’s perfect vault a perfect 10. “

Revoke their visas when they come over here,” joked Dole, hatchet still sharp after all these years.

But Shannon Miller just looked at the screen. Her score flashed: 9.950. Merely great. Not good enough for the gold. She bit her lip, and said nothing. 2

1. Miller, Claudia Ann, Shannon Miller: my child, my hero ( Oklahoma City : University of Oklahoma, 1999), 123-124.

2. Achenbach, Joel, “SHANNON MILLER’ SILVER SILENCE,” Washington Post, August 5, 1992, https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/1992/08/05/shannon-miller-silver-silence/5b9416c6-9b1f-439e-981f-04ff21c13f28/?utm_term=.d8b240175715

1992 Pre-Olympics article about Shannon from Rolling Stone

304. Graduation Canceled Because of “We Are The Champions” (1992)

This is actually something I remember from watching Hard Copy growing up in elementary school. Whenever my mom was taking her bath at 7:30 (always at 7:30, not at 7:25, not at 7:35, 7:30) she’d always just leave Hard Copy on and that was what I usually watched. Hard Copy was a television news magazine, like a mix of real news, but with a National Enquirer twist.

It was parodied on The Critic, and on Simpsons, but theirs was called “Rock Bottom”, because sometimes Hard Copy could get pretty trashy.

One of the stories I just remembered was this graduation that was canceled because the kids wanted to play Queen’s “We are the champions” at the ceremony and the principal was like, nop, not allowed, and canceled the graduation. I remember the story making me angry! I was 8! I’m pretty sure I thought about it again when it was time for me to graduate from high school in 2001.

So, the real story was that a Roman Catholic middle school in Clifton, New Jersey canceled graduation because the kids wanted to perform (or play? details are fuzzy) “We are the Champions”. 1 I’m sure due to the re-popularity of Queen because of Wayne’s World which had come out a few months prior.

The principal and the pastor of the school said no way, claiming that the song wasn’t appropriate for a church graduation ceremony. Some people thought the decision came down because Queen lead singer Freddie Mercury was bisexual and had died of AIDS the previous year.:

Principal Quinlan even canceled a field trip to the Poconos and a safety patrol picnic. 1 (which kind of sounds boring) Why does it remind me of the the Mystery Science Theater 3000 short “Last Clear Chance” with the National Safety Council?

Instead of a graduation on the last day of 8th grade, the police were there instead:

Roman Catholic school students whose graduation ceremony was canceled in a flap over a song by bisexual rock star Freddie Mercury spent the last day of the school year on a campus ringed by police.

Two AIDS activists were arrested Monday in front of Sacred Heart School. And Principal Donald Quinlan, who last week called off the eighth-grade graduation after students protested his decision to bar them from playing the song “We Are the Champions,” left the school under police guard. 3

1. ”Graduation ceremony canceled after rock anthem nixed,” Journal Times, June 7, 1992. http://journaltimes.com/news/national/graduation-ceremony-canceled-after-rock-anthem-nixed/article_5dbe2b78-f848-50cc-93ed-ae02f272c073.html

2. Jackson, Laura, Freddie Mercury: The Biography (Little, Brown Book Group, 2011), unknown pages. https://books.google.com/books?id=jBs1AgAAQBAJ&pg=PT112&lpg=PT112&dq=graduation+clifton+new+jersey+1992+we+are+the+champions&source=bl&ots=bvgHH1rV4B&sig=FxSmrwdMSxOn3n1cholfz3roHEE&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj36_aFiubTAhUJLSYKHbHuCeQQ6AEILTAD#v=onepage&q=graduation%20clifton%20new%20jersey%201992%20we%20are%20the%20champions&f=false

3. Neff, Joseph, “GRADUATES WHO INSISTED ON QUEEN SONG LEAVE WITHOUT CEREMONY,” Associated Press, June 9, 1992. http://www.apnewsarchive.com/1992/Graduates-Who-Insisted-on-Queen-Song-Leave-Without-Ceremony/id-b3ed752a5f2d53c3438a2323ac2cae30

282. Berkley’s “Naked Guy” (Time, Feb. 8, 1993)

I thought this was going to be a light hearted story, but no. Andrew died in 2006, he committed suicide in prison. He was in prison due to being in a fight at a halfway house.

How Berkeley’s ‘Naked Guy’ met a tragic end

272. Olympic Triplecast (1992)

You know how at Elvis’ Graceland, he had the three televisions lined up together so he could watch three shows at once?

I feel like that’s where the idea of the Olympic Triplecast came from. (Pay Per View Promo, 1992)

The geniuses behind this actually thought that people were going to pay $125 (that was a lot of money in 1992!) to watch the Summer Olympics uninterrupted 24 hours a day on three channels. Or, you could spring for a “bronze” package that was $95 for just the weekends, which seems a little ripoffy. The creators of the Triplecast predicted that 2-5 million people would subscribe. The New York Times was already predicting gloom a month before the games:

Said Seth Morrison, marketing director of San Francisco-based Viacom Cable, a fan of the Triplecast: “Our orders are right where we expected. We’re getting the real heavy fan. But the number is barely worth counting.” 1

I found a YouTube clip of the one guy out of the 200,000 that had money to throw away watching the Triplecast.

Ooo he has his Diet Cokes. *sigh that was the best Diet Coke can design*.

He used his vacation time to watch the Olympics nonstop with Olympics Triplecast.

He rattles off the sports he’s not into while flipping the three channels:

“I’m not that much into equestrian…”

“I’m not that big a volleyball fan…”

“The first day it came on, I thought ‘Dream Team! 4:30 in the morning, you know….I set alarms and everything..turns out it was Lithuania and Spain or something…’”

Hey now, Lithuania won the bronze that year and wore amazing uniforms to the medal ceremony:

I have found some clips from the Triplecast, here is the Womens Gymnastics Compulsories . The commentators talk for the first three minutes of the clip…I thought that was the whole point of the triplecast, to not have to hear the constant chit chatter?

You can always tell you’re watching a Triplecast clip when you see that silly logo in the top right corner.

Guess how much money was lost? $100 million.

David Letterman even made fun of it in his last few months at NBC.

Sources:

Fleischman, Bill. “What Hath Nbc Wrought? Olympic Triplecast Has Failed To Catch On With Public So Far.” The Inquirer, July 17, 1992. http://articles.philly.com/1992-07-17/sports/26025491_1_red-channel-olympic-triplecast-nbc-and-cablevision.

“20 YEARS AFTER: THE OLYMPICS TRIPLECAST,” Sports Rants, accessed August 8, 2016. http://sportsrants.com/media/2012/07/25/olympics-triplecast/

Sandomir, Richard. “OLYMPICS; Triplecast: An Olympian Blunder or Innovation?” The New York Times, June 29, 1992, accessed August 7, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com/1992/06/29/sports/olympics-triplecast-an-olympian-blunder-or-innovation.html?pagewanted=all

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272. Crystal Pepsi (and its return)

I found Crystal Pepsi today. As most of us are aware, back in early 1993, Crystal Pepsi came out with a bang. There was that often parodied Van Halen commercial that aired during the Super Bowl:

(don’t you always want to play an imaginary piano when “Right Now” plays?)

and Pizza Hut threw in a Crystal Pepsi when you ordered pizza too:

This is an article about the test market run of Crystal Pepsi in 1992:

(source)

So in early 1993 when I was 9 years old, my dad brought home Crystal Pepsi for me a few days after that Super Bowl air ran. I thought it was amazing, it felt like it had a lil lemon bite to it. Just a tad, like a little bit of 7up added to it. Keep in mind, this was long before Crystal Pepsi was reformulated a couple of years later to “Crystal from the makers of PepsI” with a bit of a citrus kick:

(this was from a long long gone eBay auction)

Pepsi did a short run of Crystal Pepsi during Christmas of 2015 as a contest on the Pepsi Pass app. I didn’t win any and I was so sad. Earlier this Summer, it debuted in Canada. We finally have it back here, and I found some at Farm Fresh this morning.

…and I didn’t like it. It tastes like that real sugar Pepsi (although 2016 Crystal Pepsi is made with corn syrup) which I loathe because it’s just way too sweet. There’s also caffeine in 2016 Crystal Pepsi. If you watched the Van Halen commercial, you know Pepsi made a big deal about Crystal Pepsi being Caffeine Free in 1993. There’s also no slight lemon taste, which I missed the most. Dang, I’m so sad. It’s just novelty Pepsi. Boo-urns.

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263. My Bundle Baby (1992)

(commercial)

How about a new crop of toys that simulate pregnancy?

This summer, Mattel will introduce My Bundle Baby, which allows little girls to pretend they are pregnant. It looks like a book bag, but is meant to be worn on the front of the body. Inside is a soft baby doll.

When a heart-shaped button on the bundle is pressed, the baby kicks and its heartbeat is audible. An opening on the top allows her to birth the baby bloodlessly. (I rather like this idea, as I suspect most women of childbearing age would.)

The young customer/mommy won’t know the baby’s sex until she opens the bundle. And if she is very lucky (or very unlucky, depending on her financial situation), she will have twins. 1

1. Abcarian, Robin. “Mother of All Surprises Is Birthing in Toyland.” Los Angeles Times, April 10, 1992. Accessed May 27, 2016. http://articles.latimes.com/1992-04-10/news/vw-324_1_baby-doll.

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200. The “Home Alone” parents (1992)

During the holiday season of 1992, when millions of families were going to the theaters to see Home Alone 2: Lost in New York, there was a real Home Alone going on in Chicago (remember? Kevin lived in Chicago.) but the parents left the kids at home on purpose. No mistake at the airport, no “Kevin was asleep in the attic” this time.

David and Sharon Schoo left their two daughters (Nicole, 9 and Dana, 4) at home during Christmas while they went to party in Acapulco. The Chicago police arrested the couple right when their plane landed on December 29th. They arrested them right on the plane! Reporters described them as “tanned and silent” as they were escorted through O’Hare Airport. The girls were put in foster care, and the parents were put on $50,000 bail each. The girls’ grandmother asked if she could take care of the girls while they were on vacation a few days prior, but Sharon informed her that care had already been arranged. The girls were discovered on December 21st (the second day of the parents 9 day vacation) after a smoke alarm was accidentally set off in the house. The girls wisely walked to the neighbors house (barefoot in the snow!) where it was discovered that they were alone. The neighbors asked where mom and dad were and they simply replied, “they’re in Mexico.” 1

Oh! What was their dad’s occupation? An engineer at a smoke alarm maker.

In the Summer of 1993, the Schoo’s relinquished their parental rights because the two never attended any reunification programs. They didn’t show up to counseling, or supervised visits. That Spring, the two plead guilty in a plea agreement to child neglect, and received two years probation. This was so the girls would avoid having to testify in court. The Schoos never explained why they left their girls during Chrismtas. 4

In 1997, the Chicago Tirbune ran an update on the family. The couple separated in 1993. The girls were still in their adoptive care, David had finished his probation, but Sharon had trouble completing hers. Their attorney was suspended for a year after trying to sell the couples story to television. 3

I would have watched that movie.

1.
Shryer, Tracy, and Shawn Hubler. “Chicago Couple Leave 2 Kids Home While They Vacation in Acapulco.” The News, December 30, 1992. https://news.google.com/newspapers?id=R2IzAAAAIBAJ&sjid=Do4DAAAAIBAJ&pg=6528%2C7616347

2. "One Year Later, ‘Home Alone’ Couple Separated, Bankrupt.“ Lawrence Journal-World, December 20, 1993. https://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=2199&dat=19931220&id=e4EyAAAAIBAJ&sjid=muYFAAAAIBAJ&pg=6641,2134254&hl=en

3.
Lyon, Jeff. "Whatever Happened To: The Schoos.” Chicago Tribune, January 12, 1997. Accessed May 31, 2015. http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1997-01-12/features/9701120169_1_gerard-kepple-sharon-schoo-david-schoo.

186. WNOR’s Mt. Trashmore April Fool Prank, 1992

This one is from the local files. WNOR, the hard rock station serving the Hampton Roads area of Virginia announced during the morning show that Mt. Trashmore was going to explode at any moment due to a large buildup of methane gas underground. Mt. Trashmore is a park in Virginia Beach that is made up from an old landfill, so people panicked and actually believed it, even if … it was April 1st:

(the article is so amusing, I’m going to c&p it)

Wnor Prank Explodes In Station’s Face
April 02, 1992|By KRIS WORRELL Daily Press
An April Fool’s prank by WNOR disc jockeys Tommy Griffiths and Henry “The Bull” Del Toro got more than laughs Wednesday morning.
Their morning drive-time warning that Mount Trashmore, Virginia Beach’s converted landfill, was about to explode triggered calls to 911, a police visit to the radio station, and an investigation by the Federal Communications Commission.
Now WNOR vice president and general manager Joseph D. Schwartz says he is considering disciplinary action against the pair.
The hoax began when Griffiths and Del Toro told listeners that a University of Virginia seismologist had detected a methane gas buildup under the old dump. They said everyone within a 7-mile radius of Mount Trashmore was to evacuate.
“A lot of people believed it and started evacuating,” said J.J. Freeman, director of the Norfolk division of the FCC.
The area’s 911 telephone emergency system was jammed with phone calls around 6:30 a.m., said Lou Thurston, public affairs officer for the Virginia Beach Police Department. The Virginia Beach Emergency Communications Division, which handles all 911 calls, received 50 to 60 calls within an hour Wednesday morning, Thurston said.
“Our major concern was tying up our emergency lines,” he said. “We didn’t want any panic to start as a result of this.”
Some worried listeners called other radio stations to find out if the emergency was real. WCMS-FM (100.5) received several calls.
“People were wondering what was going on,” said Mike Meehan, WCMS’ program director. WCMS disc jockeys quickly explained the joke to concerned callers.
About 6:45 a.m., Virginia Beach police asked WNOR to stop issuing the false warnings, the FCC reported. When the warnings continued, a Chesapeake police officer was sent to the station.
The local FCC office contacted WNOR’s Schwartz, who indicated that he was unaware of any complaints. Schwartz then issued an apology, which was broadcast throughout the rest of the day.
The FCC is gathering information to send to commission headquarters in Washington, D.C. 1

Within a few days, Tommy & The Bull was suspended without pay for two weeks. Also suspended was the program director, and the general manager of the station. 2

1. Worrell, Kris. “Wnor Prank Explodes In Station’s Face.” Daily Press, April 2, 1992. Accessed April 1, 2015. http://articles.dailypress.com/1992-04-02/news/9204020020_1_fcc-mount-trashmore-disc-jockeys.

2. Worrell, Kris. “5 Wnor Staffers Are Off The Air.” Daily Press, April 4, 1992. Accessed April 1, 2015. http://articles.dailypress.com/1992-04-04/news/9204040124_1_edward-k-christian-saga-communications-suspensions.

—

Speaking of April Fools, I love Tumblr’s homage to late 1990s/early 2000s internet and computer programs:

(Tumblr called me “Saleintothe90s Financial, Inc.”)